Rewriting your inner dialogue: a Copywriter’s take on self-talk

If my inner voice was a client, I’d have fired them years ago. Relentlessly critical. Unclear on the brief. Obsessed with worst-case scenarios.

I’ve recently begun to realise that the way I speak to myself – especially in moments of doubt – isn’t just unkind. It’s bad copy.

As a content and copywriter, I spend my days refining tone, translating complex information, and choosing words that empower. But when it comes to my own inner dialogue? I often publish convoluted, unedited drafts. Just like my WhatsApp messages and IG Story copy, I often forget to proofread the words I say to myself.

After a career curveball a couple of months ago, I’ve found myself stuck in a loop of “not enough.” Not experienced enough. Not talented enough. Not good enough.

And with every unanswered application, with every “We’ve decided to go with another candidate” email, the self-talk gets darker and harsher. Instead of giving myself constructive feedback, I berate myself. Instead of words of encouragement, run-on sentences steeped in vitriol stream into my consciousness.

But, as someone who constantly challenges others to show themselves more empathy, and who understands the power of words (both kind and unkind), I want to learn how to do what I do with ease at work: rewrites.

I first read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert over 15 years ago. And one quote stuck with me (even though I frequently forget to say it to myself):

“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate. If you want to control things in your life so bad, work on the mind. That's the only thing you should be trying to control.”

So now, leaning on the skills I’ve cultivated as a writer, I’m going to start treating my self-talk like a piece of content. Putting my keen eye, razor-sharp editing skills and creative flair to task – instead of seeing every self-hating inner monologue as the final draft, I’ll ask myself:

• Would I say this to a friend?
• Is this language inclusive, inspiring, clear?
• Does this tone reflect the values I stand for?

After all, a little copywriting magic goes a long way.

I’m creating my own self-talk style guide. Instead of “I should be further ahead”, I’m going to try- “I’m moving toward something more meaningful.”

Relate? Why not create your own? A few go-to phrases might be:

• “You’re doing your best, keep going.”
• “Aim for progression not perfection.”
• “You’re worthy of rest. Refuel and restart.”

Because the words we choose (particularly the ones no one else hears) shape how we show up in the world – and for ourselves.

So choose wisely, speak mindfully, and edit often.